Returning to Work After Mat Leave: Nervous System Tools for Week 1

Written By Core Psychology

Heading back to work after maternity leave is a big transition, and one that often stirs up a mix of emotions. For many mothers, the return to work represents a meaningful stressor, manifesting through thoughts and emotions about difficulties finding balance between work and life domains, as well as concerns related to separation from the baby. Taylor & Francis Online Many Calgary parents describe feeling torn: excitement about adult connection and routine, paired with guilt, worry, or even dread about leaving their baby. Add in the practical stress of childcare drop-offs, commuting, and adjusting to workplace demands, and it's no wonder the first week back feels overwhelming.

The good news? Your nervous system has tools to help you through this shift. Learning simple ways to regulate stress can make the first days back feel more grounded and manageable.

Here are five nervous system strategies for week one back at work.

1. Start Your Morning with Breath

Even two minutes of slow, steady breathing before the day begins can make a difference. Try inhaling for a count of four, holding for four, exhaling for six. Research has found that prolonged expiratory breathing, where the exhale is longer than the inhale, significantly activates parasympathetic nervous function, while rapid breathing suppresses it. PubMed Central This helps calm your body and signals safety to your nervous system. A systematic review on slow breathing found that psychological outcomes include reduced symptoms of arousal, anxiety, depression, anger, and confusion, alongside increased comfort and relaxation. Frontiers Many parents keep this ritual in the car before daycare drop-off or just before walking into the office.

2. Use Anchoring Cues Throughout the Day

Pick one or two sensory cues that bring you back into the present. This could be a calming scent (like lavender oil dabbed on your wrist), a grounding stone in your pocket, or simply feeling your feet firmly on the ground. Sensory grounding techniques help regulate the autonomic nervous system by shifting attention away from internal rumination to external sensory input, supporting activation of the parasympathetic nervous system and reducing physiological symptoms of anxiety such as increased heart rate and shallow breathing. Seagrass Integrated Anchoring cues work like small resets when stress spikes, and research has found that grounding exercises produce statistically significant changes in heart rate variability, reflecting increased parasympathetic tone and decreased sympathetic stress response. PubMed Central

3. Plan a Regulating Lunch Break

Instead of powering through, use your break for regulation. Go for a short walk, stretch in a quiet space, or put on a calming playlist. Research shows that even single sessions of two to five minutes of slow, intentional breathing can produce measurable increases in parasympathetic tone, indicating that short, intentional pauses can meaningfully shift your physiological state. PubMed Central The nervous system recovers best in short, intentional pauses, and even 10 minutes can help you return clearer and calmer.

4. Create Transition Rituals Between Work and Home

The shift from "employee mode" to "parent mode" can be jarring. Simple rituals, like a short drive in silence, changing clothes when you get home, or a 5-minute stretch, signal to your nervous system that one role is complete and another is beginning. Research on mothers returning to work found that teaching specific recovery strategies, including relaxation techniques, significantly reduced perceived anxiety and stress during the transition back to work. Frontiers These rituals protect your capacity to be present with your child in the evenings.

5. Practice Self-Compassion, Not Perfection

Many parents expect themselves to "do it all" flawlessly right away. Remind yourself: this is an adjustment for both you and your baby. Research suggests that self-compassion deactivates the threat system, associated with feelings of insecurity and defensiveness, and activates the self-soothing system, associated with feelings of safeness and emotional calm. ScienceDirect A meta-analysis of 56 randomized controlled trials found that self-compassion interventions meaningfully reduce depressive symptoms, anxiety, and stress across a range of populations. PubMed Central A simple mantra like, "I'm doing the best I can in this moment" can make the week feel more manageable.

You're Not Alone in This Transition

Research consistently shows that women's mental health during work re-entry is connected to the level of support they receive from coworkers and supervisors, and that greater support is associated with lower levels of stress and faster recovery. Springer Returning to work after mat leave is one of the most common topics that comes up in individual counselling with new parents. The mix of emotions is normal, and support can make the shift easier. At Core Psychology, our team in Calgary and online across Alberta works with parents to build regulation skills, balance work and family roles, and reduce anxiety during big life changes.

Just Know

Your first week back will likely feel messy, and that's okay. With small nervous system tools, breath, anchors, rituals, compassion, you can steady yourself and create a more balanced return. Support is available if you need it.

Ready for extra help in your transition? Reach out to a mental health professional and give yourself the care you deserve.

Core Psychology
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